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Motherly does not endorse any political party or candidate. We stand with and for mothers and advocate for solutions that will reduce maternal stress and benefit women, families and the country. Most Americans believe the time has come for paid leave , but there has yet to be a national plan that a majority can get behind. This week California Senator and presidential hopeful Kamala Harris announced her own plan, one that she hopes will resonate with voters. Harris wants every working American to have access to six months of paid family and medical leave. It's part of a platform she calls "Kamala's Children's Agenda" and is based on the idea that "every decision we make has a profound impact on our nation's youngest, most vulnerable residents.
We know that both children and parents benefit from paid family leave. Paid leave is good for babies' cognitive development. And when mothers have access to leave they are more likely to breastfeed for longer.
When fathers or partners take parental leave it is good for mama's mental health which is good for children. Harris is only one of several Democrats aiming for the oval office but her plan goes further than what her peers are proposing. Former presidential-hopeful Kirsten Gillibrand proposed the Family Act as part of her Family Bill of Rights , and while she's out of the running for the nomination her plan could make it, as Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders both support it. We don't know if Harris' plan will work or if her Children's Agenda will propel her to the White House, but we do know that America needs a paid leave plan and we're happy to hear politicians coming up with them.
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We can't control the challenges our children will face in life, but that doesn't mean we can't prepare them. One of the most powerful gifts we can give our kids is resilience—the ability to overcome the inevitable obstacles headed their way. Helping kids develop resilience means they will be able to recover from setbacks, rather than wallowing in them. Unfortunately, there are a lot of well-meaning things parents say that can inadvertently hinder this developing skill. While "you're fine," may seem like just the kind of phrase to encourage grit and resilience, it's actually sending the message that kids can't trust what they're feeling.
This is another version of "suck it up. Instead, try validating your child's emotions, while using your tone and body language to send the message that you believe they will be okay. If your child falls and scrapes their knee, you can empathize and check on them without acting like it's an emergency. Don't run over and swoop them off their feet while crying tears of your own. Walk over calmly and take a look at the scrape, asking if they are okay.
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This approach lets your child know that while, yes, they are hurt, their feelings are okay and they will recover. Whether it's because we're in a hurry or because it's so hard to watch our children struggle, it's easy to want to fix their problems. This doesn't mean you can't help and support them, just try not to take over. If they're having trouble tying their shoes, it feels easier to simply do it for them than to stand by and see if they really need a little help. If they are struggling with a friend, you might want to talk to the other child's parent and try to fix things behind the scenes than let your child navigate the situation.
But doing these things will only hurt in the long run. Offer the minimum amount of help they need to be successful. Instead of simply tying their shoe for them, try offering verbal support, saying something like "now make a bunny ear. Watch your child to see how much they can handle. You want to challenge them, but not overwhelm them. There will of course be times when you don't have time to let your child do something for themselves, and that's fine too. Maybe there's no time for your child to tie their own shoes in the morning before school, but they can practice on the weekends.
As they become more capable, they can do more and more for themselves. While this little phrase might seem encouraging, telling a child something that seems challenging is easy will only take away their desire to try. Instead of telling them a task is easy, try "I know that's hard, but I think you can do it.
It's not fun to watch our kids fall and get hurt, but when you see your child doing something that makes you uncomfortable, try to assess the situation. Are they likely to get injured, or just get a little bump or a bruise?
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Is there a way you can spot your child to protect them without them noticing? By constantly telling our children to be careful, or that they might fall, we are sending the message that they are not safe. Every parent has to use their judgement and own comfort level with risk. If you see your toddler starting to climb up a slide and a big kid is at the top about to go down, you will likely want to stop them so they don't get kicked. But if you see your toddler climbing a ladder on the playscape for the first time, try simply being there to catch them if they fall, without letting them see your fear.
Perhaps the most important tool for teaching resilience is modeling. Does your child see you give up easily or get upset when you try something new, or do they see you staying calm in the face of challenges? It's important to let your child see you struggle, and let them see that it's okay. Try learning a new skill together so that they can see that this sometimes frustrating process is not just for kids, that everyone faces struggles when learning something new. We want to teach our kids how to calm themselves down when they're upset, but saying "calm down" isn't the way to do this.
Try saying, "let's take a deep breath together" instead. Or even look your child in the eyes and take a few deep, calming breaths yourself. We can gradually equip our kids with specific techniques to regulate their emotions.
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This might mean practicing deep breathing together, or asking for a hug or hugging a favorite stuffed animal. It might mean stepping outside to take a break from a situation and experience the calming effects of nature. Help your child develop these tools when they're not too upset to hear you. Eventually they will learn to turn to them when it feels like things are in crisis. Making life too easy for our kids robs them of the chance to face the minor challenges and discomforts that help to naturally develop resilience.
You can help your child gradually take over the responsibility for these tasks. For a 3-year-old, you might remind them to carry their lunchbox and backpack to the car in the morning, instead of carrying their things for them. For a 6-year-old, it might look like creating a checklist together of all of the things they need to remember in the morning, but putting them in charge of going through the checklist. A 9-year-old might be able to take full responsibility for remembering their things, but this of course depends on the child.
Gradually increasing their level of responsibility will help them be successful. We love our children so of course we want them to be comfortable and happy and to have a great day every day, but in the end, it's more important to equip them with the tools they need for the not so good days.
Children try to do things that they may not be ready for all the time. They might reach for a 1, piece puzzle, they might want to help you with a "grown-up task" like building a new shelf or fixing something on the car. It's easy to tell kids that something is too hard for them, or that they're not ready to do something, but try steering them to a more age-appropriate task instead. You might say, "It takes a lot of practice to get ready for a 1, piece puzzle, why don't we try the new piece one you got for your birthday together?
Saying these phrases directs children toward something they can be successful with, without sending the message they we think they're incapable. Take note of how often you find yourself saying some variation of "not like that! It's so tempting to stop them when we see them doing something wrong like holding their fork in such a way that spaghetti is about to fall all over their shirt or putting their shoes on the wrong feet. But why not let them drop the spaghetti, then let them clean it up?
Why not let them wear their shoes on the wrong feet so that they have a feeling of accomplishment rather than incompetence? It's okay if things aren't done perfectly, it's okay if our kids have to stop and clean up a mess. In these instances, sit with your child while they clean it up, helping if necessary. You can then show them a more effective way to complete a task. You might say, "Can I show you a trick? If you hold your plate with two hands, you won't drop it next time. While we want to send the message that we believe our children are competent, this doesn't mean they're on their own.
On the contrary, children will be more likely to feel like they can try something new and face a challenge if they know they have support.
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Instead of sending them off on their own to face a tough situation, let them know that you're in it together. Say something like, "Let's sit down and come up with a solution together. Resilience is a tough quality to teach because it involves watching our kids struggle, even watching them fail.
This can be a hard thing for parents to do, but remind yourself that you're not making your child struggle, you're letting them struggle. You are allowing them to face every day challenges so that when the big challenges come, your child will know that they can face the challenge and be okay. Cue the zombie memes and comeback anthems: Toys "R" Us is making a comeback just in time for Christmas.
This follows a recent announcement by Tru Kids that it is also partnering with Candytopia to launch pop-up experiences called "The Toys 'R' Us Adventure. There are plans to expand the pop-ups to other cities after Christmas. This announcement follows previous reports of a planned holiday revival for the Toys "R" Us brand. At that time a spokesperson for Tru Kids told Motherly there was no official comment, but Bloomberg' s reports came after Barry had reportedly pitched this plan at an industry conference.
The toy industry, and those of us consuming its goods, have been anticipating something like this since early , when Tru Kids Inc. That's when Barry began promising that his company was brainstorming new ideas for its comeback. All Toys "R" Us stores in the U.
This left nearly 20, employees out of work, and sent many toy manufacturers in disarray. Interestingly, the closures didn't just mean parents bought their kids' toys online or at other stores.
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This is presumably because without a giant toys-only wonderland before them, people were somehow more restrained in their buying habits. Other factors, such as a declining birth rate and the rise of video games, have been blamed for the slowing of toy sales. The people bringing Toys "R" Us back from the dead know some things have to change for the rebirth to be successful. According to Bloomberg , the new, smaller stores, will include adjustments to modern buying habits. There will be an emphasis on experiences, including play areas in the stores. Products might also be sold on consignment, so Toys "R" Us won't pay the makers until they sell the toys to consumers.
How manufacturers burned by the company's bankruptcy will react to that idea remains to be seen. Will nostalgic Toys "R" Us kids—and their kids—flock to the new adventure pop-up? That remains to be seen, as does what cities will be getting the experience. It has been updated. In a world where our phones are constantly blasting us alerts about troubling news it is good to remember that there are good news stories happening in our world, too. At Motherly, we like to keep track of these for you to give you a little boost when you need one, mama. It's no secret that splitting up is never easy or simple—and it all just gets more complicated when there are children in the mix.
Of course, it reaches a whole new level of complexity when you factor in new partners, too. But blending a family is possible and if you can do it well, it's a pretty beautiful thing. Just ask Madison Holley, a mom who is going viral after posting a truly heartwarming photo of her own blended family. The post, which was shared to Love What Matters' Facebook page , shows two men walking hand-in-hand with a young boy as one of the men carries a newborn in a car seat. The photo itself is quite powerful, but once you know the story behind it, it takes on a whole new meaning.
The guy on the left is my ex, the 3-year-old holding his hand is my first child, Cade, we had together. Not only does such practices operate to keep your environment green, but it is also very friendly on the environment. The amounts of sulfates and chemicals that enter our water systems do so through laundry, sinks, and even watering a lawn.
Hopefully Sienna will listen to her fans and give Carlo the love he needs and desires. You might just want to sell one product, and only need a simple checkout experience for it, or you may want to build your own full-featured online store. In Zimbabwe, the use of forest products in protected forests by local communities has a long history, but few studies have explored both the socio-economic and ecological aspects of this use.
Read for a book club. But unfortunately the robots end up revolting against their masters, finally wiping out the human race. Thoughtful and reflective, it draws upon some of the most enlightened figures from both the past and the present as it gently guides you through your day. I can admire his dedication to making things right by fighting to give the other marines their lives back. I must say the first two novels of the new set volumes 7 and 8 respectively were,at least to me, somewhat disapointing. Kinda disappointing.
Anna Nestor views Kawashita as a sideshow attraction until they fall in love.
Not all her memories of living in Christmas Tree Valley are pleasant. Pixel-Perfect Labrint pdf.